Brenda Drake's holding another awesome contest--this time with agent Ammi-Joan Paquette. You should seriously go check it out!
My entry is my YA novel Shadows. This is seriously the first time I've debuted anything about it, so here goes nothing!
My two sentence pitch (now slightly revised based on feedback from awesome people!):
Leah’s always seen strange shadow creatures she calls ‘harbingers of evil’ for good reason. When they come after her family, she has two objectives: (1) figure out what they are, and (2) kill them all.
Based on the originals:
Step one: figure out what the oily shadows creatures are that Leah has always seen, and why they seem to the harbingers of evil. Step two: figure out how to kill them all.
OR
The shadows Leah attracts aren’t the normal kind—she calls them the ‘harbingers of evil’ for a good reason. Finding out what they are, and how to get rid of them, will take some otherworldly inspiration.
Yikes! I'd love some feedback on these!
Okay, on to my first 150 words (again, with small changes):
OLD VERSION for the curious:
The dark rind of dried blood wasn’t coming out from under my fingernails no matter how hard I scrubbed. I finally grabbed a paper towel and turned off the faucet, giving up. Slipping on the grimy floor, I used the same towel to push open the door. The heavy door slammed shut as I took a deep breath of fresh air.
The wooden dowel the gas-station owner used to keep any non-customers from using his bathroom was shoved into my back pocket, and I stepped inside the small convenience store to return it. The man behind the counter was reading a magazine with some stacked girl posing on the front in a suggestive manner. I dropped the key on the counter and muttered “In your dreams,” as I walked away. The clerk didn’t look up.
An electronic chime sounded as the front door opened and I glanced up just in time to avoid slamming into a female cop entering the store.OLD VERSION for the curious:
The dark rind of dried blood wasn’t coming out from under my fingernails no matter how hard I scrubbed. I finally grabbed a paper towel and turned off the faucet, giving up. Slipping on the grimy floor, I used the same towel to push open the door. The heavy door slammed shut as I took a deep breath of fresh air.
The wooden dowel the gas-station owner used to keep any non-customers from using his bathroom was shoved into my back pocket, and I stepped inside the small convenience store to return it. The man behind the counter was reading a magazine with some girl posing on the front in a suggestive manner. I dropped the key on the counter and was already planning my route back to the freeway as I turned to leave.
An electronic chime sounded as the front door opened and I glanced up just in time to avoid slamming into a female cop entering the store. I can't wait to check out the other entries!!
