So, yeah, lately I have been contemplating why I haven't decided that I'm done trying to get my books out in the world. It has nothing to do with the writing itself (I know I can't give that up because it's the only thing keeping me marginally sane) but the querying and agent hunting and marketing and book sales that make me wonder if it's worth it. I work full-time in a job that is incredibly demanding and leaves me little time to market, nor funds to have someone help me out. And I worry constantly that I'm "serving two masters" and spreading myself way too thin.
Should I just stop writing and focus solely on my day job? I must ask myself this at least ten times a day.
But I haven't. And it's not born out of some inner confidence that I'm some amazing writer (I know I'm not--and I'm not fishing for compliments or anything, just being honest :), or some hope that someday I'm going to "make it to the big time" (because as cool as that would be, the odds are vanishingly slim). Nope. It's just because I'm stubborn, and I like telling stories, and there's still a thrill in the hope that someone out there may at some point enjoy one of my books. So, I'm plugging along, sleeping too little, pretty certain that I'm someday going to get a massive ulcer, but that's okay. I'm just going to continue on, a little pig-headed (where did that saying come from??), and try to have fun with it. Because, at the end of the day, what else is there to do? :)So, inquiring minds wish to know: what are you stubborn/dedicated about?
Oh! And announcements :) I've been tagged in the Facebook Art Challenge and posting some of my favorite photos over on my page and instagram--that's been fun! And on the 4th, I'm over on Lightening Quick Reads with another short story. This one's a kissy one with Bea and Nathan from Surrender the Sky, lol! (Hey, it's February--what do you expect?)
Definitely don't quit! Like you say, all we can do is plug along. I don't have an illusion that I would ever sell millions of books, just one person enjoying it would be a reward. Oh, and I'm reading Colours Like Memories (sorry, I can't help spelling it the "proper" way, never mind the wavy red line), and enjoying it! Look forward to the rest of the series. Look at you, you've got a good range of books out there already and having a backlist for people to delve into is half the battle of marketing. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteIf nothing else, if writing keeps you sane, then by all means keep writing. So what if you only publish for yourself? I'm stubborn when it comes to what I write. I don't write to trends for sure, I write what I want to read. I doubt it will even hit the big time, but do I care? Nope.
ReplyDeletegood for you! this biz is brutal. I vowed to get an agent by 30 (check) a book deal by 31 (no check yet!)...I am having tough time digging into my new story though I do love it, but I'm insanely stubborn and structured and refuse to give up!
ReplyDeleteI think what you should do is figure out what your intention is. Are you writing for the pleasure of writing or are you writing so the pleasure of writing is ALL that you do?
ReplyDeleteWhat I mean by that is you seem to enjoy your day job, and so working that doesn't suck the ever-loving life out of you (like some of us *ahem*). So the push to write-to-live is a little less, in my opinion. For you, it seems to be more a write-to-write kind of intention.
Once you figure out what it is you want to do, then do it wholeheartedly. But please, don't stop writing!
I so resemble that! Keep it up, Meradeth! Your energy and creativity and talents are an inspiration!
ReplyDeleteNever stop writing! If it brings you enjoyment, you should focus on the part of it that makes you happy and not worry so much about the parts that you don't enjoy.
ReplyDeleteI can't stop because writing is part of who I an. This industry is tough though. No doubt about it.
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I am stubborn too, and I think it is mostly in a good way. I agree that it is important to to do what makes you happy and writing makes you happy and keeps you sane. I know you are busy with your full time job and other pulls on your time, but at least when you write you feel better. Keep writing! I know the querying and other parts are tough, so maybe just do what you can and try not to worry about it (I know, easier said than done). :) I know I can't wait for the next Sary book- so you can't stop! :)
ReplyDeleteGreat post. It will come to fruition one day!
ReplyDeleteMeradeth, I commend you for not giving up on your passion, especially since it keeps your mind afloat and at peace. I say "at peace" carefully because I know when our plots are not working the way we wish they would, our minds can be very noisy!
ReplyDeleteI mean the type of peace that can only be attained by pursuing our passion and knowing we are doing the right thing.
I totally understand your woes about the day job. I always say if I didn't have to work to support myself, I would write fulltime and be a bestseller, lol. In the little time we do have, we must make the most of it. Today, I had a snow day from work so I have been at my desk since 7am engaging with my author duties. I even finished writing the 2nd half of my 4th picture book today! We'd be Superwomen in this industry if we had more time, I am sure. But until then, we have to continue to make whatever sacrifices need be.
I know you will succeed, Meradeth! Just keep persevering!
As I say, I write, therefore I am.
ReplyDeleteI love that quote- it made me teary-eyed, b/c I am so there. Here recently I've been really obsessing over being an author. I want to be able to call myself that, and have a Book page tab and bookmarks and be able to promote my book, etc. But I can't. And it's so frustrating. And then I worry that the book I'm currently revising will end up just like this one, without a home except for my laptop. And I've been bummed b/c a small press that I really liked had my full and I was so hopeful they'd offer and they didn't. But I'll keep waiting for that dawn. =)
ReplyDeleteI completely understand! I've been struggling with this same question since about the middle of last year. I think I'm slowly coming around again to the "It is what it is" way of thinking. It's hard though, because I have an all-in personality, and if I decide to write, it means I've decided to promote and market and network and give each thing I publish a chance to succeed. Sometimes I wish I could dial that down a bit. I feel ya! Can't wait to read your short on the 4th.
ReplyDeleteI've had the same question, but the fact is writing has been a must in my life for years. I can write without getting published, but I want to be read. It is draining, but at the same time worthwhile.
ReplyDelete